


A Soul's Worth

by aquariustar



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Bondage, Bottom Castiel, Bottom Dean, Bottom Dean Winchester, Demon Dean, Demon Dean Winchester, Dom Dean Winchester, Dom/sub, Dubious Consent, Edging, Fluff and Angst, Human Castiel, Hunter Castiel, Knight of Hell Dean Winchester, Light BDSM, Light Bondage, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Oral Sex, Orgasm Control, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Orgasm Denial, Prince of Hell Dean Winchester, Rough Oral Sex, Smut, Sub Castiel, Supernatural Reverseverse, Switch Castiel, Switch Dean, Top Castiel, Top Dean, Top Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2018-04-23
Packaged: 2019-02-19 08:36:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,096
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13120092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aquariustar/pseuds/aquariustar
Summary: Dean, as the prince of hell, is very good at his job.Probably because he was as empty as the people he tortures and kills on a daily basis.Until one day a hunter, Castiel, summons him to make a deal-- his body and soul in exchange for his sister's.Just another soul at his mercy. Just another human to drag down to the Pit.Dean wished he was as soulless as he thought he was.OR the reverse AU where Cas is a hunter with a questionable past and Dean is a demon who thought he was indestructible.*** Tags will be updated as the story goes on. It will spoil the story too much. ****** Rated as Explicit for some smut (yay) that will come in later chapters ****** There will be some dubious consent scenes ***





	1. The Deal

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for grammar/spelling mistakes that I might have missed!  
> A new update will come as soon as possible!

It was a usual day in Hell as Dean was having his fun at the racks. It was another boring decade in hell, with the usual torture, punishments, and killing.

He looked down at the body tied down in front of him, covered in bruises and blood. Another damned human at the tip of his blade. 

“Stop… ” He whispered through his swollen lips, sputtering out blood in the process. “Please stop…”

Dean ignored him completely as he pushed his palm firmly against the open wound on the man's chest, sucking in the man’s soul.

He felt a rush of power coursing through him as he saw a part of the man’s memory flicker in front of him.

 

_A blonde woman was bloodied and bruised under his fist as he held her by her throat._

_"You thought you could just run away like that, slut? So that you could go screw some rich guy? You didn't think I know?"_

_His fingers tightened around her as she writhed under him, trying to fight him off._

_“No...please... stop…” she mouthed as her face slowly turned blue._

_He barely heard a child crying in the background as anger overcame him._

_He didn't let go even as the last breath escaped her lips. The very last breath that tainted his soul red._

 

Dean smirked as he tasted the memory on his tongue.

“I think those were the exact words your wife said as you choked her to death,” Dean stated coldly as he plunged his first blade into his chest.

The man squealed as he died for the fifth time that day. His soul almost dried out.

His body was almost drained now, leaving behind just a bag of skin filled with blood and bones.

Soulless.

 

A bitter smell of smoke surprised Dean as he staggered backward from the torture table.

 _This is new,_ Dean thought as felt an unfamiliar tug in his chest few seconds before the arrival.

Nobody ever summoned him. No one dared to. If they valued their life that is.

Either this person had serious balls or was just very stupid. He would have felt bad for the person if he was capable of feeling anything like pity.

He sheathed his first blade at his belt and hopped out of the torture chamber while stretching his back and sore arms.

It wouldn’t be too bad to go for a walk on Earth for a while. Hell was getting boring.

Dean slung his leather jacket on and adjusted his flannel underneath as he casually spoke into the empty space. He knew that wherever he was he will hear him.

Perks of being a demon.

“Crowley, I am going for a little milk run.”

The air next to him shifted as red smoke formed through the darkness of hell. Soon the smoke solidified into a short middle-aged man wearing a black coat.

“This is hell sweetie, we don’t go for milk runs, we go for little killing sprees.” Crowley was snarked even before he fully materialized. 

Dean rolled his eyes. 

"Stop being a whiny grump and fill in for me, would'ya?" 

Crowley squinted at him. 

"You owe me big time for this," he grumbled. "Lucifer won't be pleased." 

"Tell the old man that I will bring some cookies back for him and he will be fine."

Crowley sighed. 

"You are lucky you are pretty, Winchester. Or you would have been disintegrated ages ago." 

Dean just smirked and winked at Crowley before transporting himself to the place of the summoning. 

 

As a demon who wasn't summoned very often, he now understood why demons were always so pissy when they showed up. 

Being summoned felt like he was being yanked across two dimensions by his gut and he felt a little nauseous when he hit the floor.

The smoke from the burnt sacrifices made for the summoning didn't help either. 

Dean blinked a couple of times until his vision cleared and had a first clear look at his client. 

 

A death glare slash squint by the most electrifying blue eyes greeted him. The man had the messiest dark hair that was sticking up all over the place.

His black trench coat showed the well-built body underneath and Dean couldn’t help but admire how the material was tight on his body at just the right places.

He also noticed a knife he was holding by side, almost masked by the trench coat but having demon eyes had its perks.

 

“Why hello there,” Dean’s lips curled into a cheeky smile and his usual black eyes flicked to emerald green. 

 

“Demon,” the man addressed him curtly, his voice even deeper than Dean’s. It wasn’t something he expected but Dean decided that he definitely liked it.

 

“No need to get so formal, pal. Name’s Dean. What’s yours?”

 

The man did a small tilt of his head as if he was trying to judge if Dean was being serious or not. Dean just thought he looked like a lost kitty.

Dean just smiled at him, his eyes roaming down on his body one more time. This night just got a tad more interesting.

 

The man hesitated another minute before answering. “Castiel.”

 

It was Dean’s turn to squint. An angelic name. How fitting. But he didn’t like the -iel to it.

It meant “of God” and his little Demon-self was not too fond of it. It made his tongue burn.

“Yeeaaah…. I’m just gonna call you Cas, buddy”

 

Castiel’s mouth tightened into a thin line.

 

“So,” Dean tilted his head and started walking toward him. Then realized that he wasn’t able to. A quick glance downwards showed a perfect devil’s trap under him.

 

“Very ready for me, aren’t ya?” Dean's eyes switched to black with a sudden annoyance.

To his credit, Castiel didn’t even flinch.

“What can I do for ya, Cas?” Dean purred as he stared unblinkingly at the human. 

 

Castiel stared back with those piercing blue eyes that seemed to look through him.

“I want to make a deal.”

 

Dean narrowed his eyes. "Of course you do," he sneered.

"But it's kind of a bold move for a puny little hunter to summon a knight of hell, isn't it?" 

Dean took a step forward, inching closer to the edge of the devil's trap.

It was getting a tad bit uncomfortable, but Dean was too strong for a mere devil's trap to bother him too much. 

"I mean there are so many crossroad demons out there. But you just _had_ to summon _me_. Not that I am complaining-" he gave the human a little wink. 

"But why me?" 

 

“Because—“ Castiel grated out.

“Only a prince of hell could bring back someone from the dead.”

 

* * * * * * *

 

“Eight years” Castiel huffed. 

Dean raised an eyebrow at him.

“Are you kidding me? No.”

"Seven."

"No."

"Six."

"You keep going, sugar. I will keep saying no."

 

Cas closed his eyes and ran his hand through his already messy hair. 

"Three years. Or no deal."

"Then no deal." Dean replied, cool as a chipper. 

 

"I can keep you in this devil's trap, demon." Castiel hissed, pointing his knife at him threatening. 

 

"Try me, sweetheart," Dean smiled leisurely.

"Time is by my side. Immortal, remember? Just make sure you bury your sister’s body before she starts stinking up."

Castiel was on him in an instant, and Dean howled as he felt the holy water burning his skin. 

 

"Hey! What the fuck was that for?" 

 

"Don't you dare talk about her, abomination," Cas seethed he stood almost at the edge of the devil's trap, glaring daggers at him. 

"She didn't deserve any of this. Any of it!" Cas' shoulders drooped as suddenly all the fight left him. He hung his head. 

 

"I need to... set things straight. She deserves to have a normal happy life for once."

Cas looked up and met Dean's eyes. His blue eyes were like lightning, fierce and crackling with... a resolve. A mission. 

"I need to kill this man. For her. Even if she comes back to life, she will not be safe. I need time. Please." 

 

For the first time in a long while, Dean was conflicted.

It was always so easy in hell. Everyone was guilty.

He just had to find the right angle to stab, the best way to cause pain and to make his prey suffer for as long as he wanted.

No hesitation, no dilemma. 

But that's what made Hell so boring. There wasn't a concept of choice. But now, he had one. 

 

Dean twirled the first blade in his hand as he observed his prey through his lashes. He could just drag him to hell right now after he finished his part of the deal. 

It will be easy and quick. 

 

“Look… I shouldn’t be doing this. I could get in a LOT of trouble," Dean chuckled. 

 

"But what can I say? I got a blind spot for you, Cas. You’re like a… kicked kitty. You will be just so fun to play with."

Dean shamelessly dragged his eyes all over Cas again, and this time, maybe it was his imagination, but he saw a tinge of pink on the human's cheeks. 

 

_Will he blush the same way when I fuck him?_

 

"So… here’s the final deal. I will bring your sister back to life and we will find and gank this son of a bitch you so want to kill." 

Castiel frowned at the words. 

"We?"

Dean smirked at him.

"Why, yes, darlin'. You and me. I cannot possibly let you go by yourself.

You might give me a slip and it would a bitch to track you down all over again to drag you down to hell." 

 

Castiel looked confused as his eyes narrowed into slits. Dean could visibly see him gulp as he worried his bottom lip with his teeth. 

Dean traced the way his teeth sank into the pink plump flesh. 

 

_How delicious will it be when I taste his lips and ruin him?_

 

"You want to... help me?" Cas asked incredulously. 

 

Dean snorted. The innocence of this human was too sickeningly sweet. 

"Of course, sweetheart. We are _pals_ here. Just helping each other out." He purred, hooking his thumbs in his belt and leaned in with his most charming smile. 

 

It was now Cas' turn to snort. 

"Nothing comes without a price. What the catch?" 

 

_Oh, that voice. I wonder how he sounds when he moans and whines?_

 

"During all your time left on earth, your soul and body will be mine... entirely." 

* * *

 

Hunter Castiel

 


	2. Tainted

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Lightly dubious consent

Castiel Novak had met many nightmares in his life. Most of them clawed at his skin, broke his bones, and aimed for his throat. But at the end, they all perished by the tip of his dagger.

It was what the Novaks did. Saving people, hunting things, the family business.

 

But as Castiel grew, he came to realize that the worst nightmares couldn’t be killed or exorcized. They kept him awake at night, making him break a cold sweat every time he woke up with a scream.

 

Anna wasn’t the one who should die that night. She was supposed to be enjoying her night out with her friends, have some nasty hangover the next morning, and live on with her life at the university. Castiel wasn’t able to save her as the demon plunged a knife into her chest. Castiel had sobbed in the middle of Anna’s dorm as he held her lifeless body closer to his chest.

 

“I will bring you back, Anna. I promise.” He whispered and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She looked so peaceful, cradled in his arms. Her silky red hair flowed down her shoulders like the stream of blood that left her chest. 

 

Castiel left Anna and summoned the most powerful demon he could find in the lore. It was suicidal, but Castiel didn’t care if he lived or died at that point. So with shaky hands, he drew a devil’s trap and gathered the ingredients for the spell. If his death would mean that Anna could have a normal life, it was worth it.

 

Now Castiel stood in front of the Demon he summoned, the knight and prince of hell.

The demon’s green eyes danced with mischief as he watched Castiel consider the offer.

 

Body and Soul. That was Dean’s terms.

He didn’t understand. When Dean drags him down to hell, he will have his body and soul anyway.

 

“What… do you mean?” He asked carefully. He was never good at following people’s intentions. But he was quite certain that Dean’s intentions weren’t so pure.

 

“Hmm… I can show you to sweeten the deal,” Dean’s eyes glowed as he took another step forward. A sudden shock wave went through the air as Dean stepped on the boundary of the devil’s trap.

 

Castiel gasped as he jumped back. “What—“

 

Dean sneered at him. “I am a prince of hell, Cas. You will need to try harder than a simple _devil’s trap_ to keep me in.”

Thunder clapped as he stomped his foot on the ground. The ground beneath him shuddered and cracked as the sigil finally gave in and split in two.

 

Castiel hastily staggered back but Dean was faster as he lunged for human, disarming the human with a quick snap of his fingers. The demon knife flew from Castiel’s hands and landed few feet away from him.

 The next moment, those earthly green eyes were mere inches away from his own.

A gasp involuntarily escaped from Castiel’s lips as he noticed how brightly they glowed.

“So how about that free trial, huh?” Dean smiled down at him.

 

* * *

 

Dean did expect Castiel to be a fighter but that blow was harder than he expected. 

“Son of a bitch!” he groaned, his jaw aching from the punch.

Castiel’s kick came in quick succession but Dean was prepared this time. He caught his ankle under his arm while twisting Cas’s wrist in the process. Castiel grunted as he lost balance and fell on his back, with Dean falling on him.

“Easy tiger,” Dean growled as he forced both of Castiel’s wrists above his head and held them there with one hand.

Castiel bucked, trying to get Dean off but Dean straddled him, locking his thighs. He could feel the strong muscles tense under him but they were no match for demon strength. He gripped the human’s wrists tighter as he drank in the sight. The tidy black trench coat was now dirtied by the mud and the black shirt and blue tie he wore underneath were disheveled. The buttons on his shirt tugged in its confines as Castiel continued to struggle.

 

“Get off me, demon!”

 

Dean raised an eyebrow. “I thought you wanted your sister alive, Cas?”

That effectively got Cas to his senses as he stopped writhing under him. But the glare he set on Dean was murderous.

If Dean wasn’t a demon, he would have cowered under it.

 

“And how is _this_ part of the deal?”

 

“I am trying to be a good guy here, Cas. I bring your sister back to life and I am even helping you with this little manhunt of yours.

All you have to do is to let me…”

 

Dean brought his free hand to Cas’s throat. Cas flinched, expecting Dean to throttle him, but Dean just touched the column of his neck gently with his fingertips.

 

“do”

 

His hand smoothed down to his collarbone. And down to his chest.

 

“anything”

 

He teased one of Cas’s nipple over his shirt. He heard the human’s breath hitch.

 

“I want.”

 

He moved to feel around Cas’ ribs, tracing the crevices between the bones. Dean smirked as he felt the hard muscles fluttering under his touch.

 

“To body and soul.” He whispered as lowered himself on Castiel, breathing down on his collarbone.

 

He snaked his hand underneath Cas’s back, half embracing him. He still kept the human’s hands immobile with his other hand, even though he wasn’t fighting back anymore. The position gave Castiel no choice but to arch his back so that now he was chest-to-chest with the demon.

 

He peaked at Cas’s face and saw that his pupils have dilated and his breathing was heavier.

 

“What do you say, Cas?” Dean’s voice dropped a pitch lower as he studied the shifting emotions through Castiel’s eyes.

 

Dean watched as Castiel’s long eyelashes fluttered like a butterfly caught in a net.  It was quite mesmerizing.

Dean waited, never breaking his gaze.

 

“Yes.” He whispered, his voice was huskier than Castiel wanted it to be. 

Dean smiled ghosted his lips over Cas’s neck as he moved slowly upwards toward his chin, his stubble… until he was only a few centimeters away from Castiel’s lips.

 

They were already open from the human’s gasps and it would be so easy to just plunge inside and taste him. But that wasn’t how things work.

 

“You _know_ what comes next,” He whispered.

Dean watched as Castiel’s closed his eyes and pressed upward, their lips finally meeting.

The human's lips were chapped but still soft. Not too soft like a women’s as Dean felt the light stubble scratching his chin. But it was purest that Dean has ever tasted.

 

As soon as Cas's lips met Dean's, Dean wasted no time devouring his mouth and claiming him with his tongue.

Little did he know that the kiss tainted Castiel’s soul another shade crimson.  

 

 


	3. No Lies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays everyone! And a late Merry Christmas!  
> Love you guys sooooo much <3  
> Sorry for the typos and mistakes that I might have missed!

Castiel braced himself for the kiss to taste like ash.

To be bitter, harsh, and unforgiving.

So he was surprised when Dean’s tongue flicked against his lips, teasing it open. It was gentle and curious, yet demanding.

Cas didn’t dare move a muscle as his mouth stayed frozen in place. His lips were parted, but unmoving.

He was afraid if he did move, he would actually kiss the demon back.

 

Dean didn’t seem to mind as he effectively attacked Castiel’s mouth. As soon as Cas took the first initiative, Dean took charge of the kiss, as if he was starving for it.

Dean’s tongue swirled around his and Castiel groaned at the feeling.

Dean seemed encouraged by his response as he sucked on his bottom lip, grazing it lightly with his teeth.

It was something- he never experienced before.

He had been kissed, of course. By both men and women, whose names mattered only for one night.

They came and left, sharing the warmth and living for the moment. But when they left, the empty side of the bed only felt much colder than before.

Dean’s warmth wasn’t like the others. He was fire, burning him from inside out. He held him possessively as a long lost lover would, crushing their bodies together.

Owning him, making him his.

No one wanted him like this. Ever. Castiel couldn’t blame them. There were too many complications.

Ones that Dean couldn't care less about. 

This was a surreal feeling as if he became lighter, free, floating-

 

_No! What am I thinking?_

 

Castiel’s eyes flew open as he jerked his head to the side and twisted free of Dean’s grasp. He was breathless from the kiss as he rolled to his side, curling into himself.

 

“I think that’s sufficient to seal the deal,” Castiel choked out, not daring to look at the demon’s face.

He could almost see the sneer on his lips. Is this how far he had fallen? To the point that he was actually enjoying a kiss with a demon?

 

Dean was quiet for a moment and in that short time, Cas was suddenly afraid. What if he goes back on his deal? What if he angered him with his refusal?

But Dean merely lets out a low chuckle, and Castiel cursed himself when it sent a light tingle down his spine.

“Just a bonus to the package, angel.”

 

“Is it done?” Cas rasped out, ignoring Dean’s new nickname for him.

 

“You mean your sister? Yeah, she’s alive and kickin’ again.”

 

Cas breathed in deeply. Anna was alive again. That was all that matters. A somewhat sense of calm settled in his chest.

“I— I am going to go see her.”

He stood up briskly, avoiding Dean’s gaze. He dusted his black trench coat and tried to make his tie look sensible again.

But he felt that whatever he did, he would still look like someone who was fucked senseless. 

 

“What? Dude, you don’t believe me?” Dean complained, hurt evident in his voice.

 

“I am sorry but demons aren’t very known for being truthful,” Castiel deadpanned, with his back to Dean.

He walked over to his knife that Dean disarmed him from and swiftly picked it up.

 

“Touché,” Dean replied coolly.

 

“So you will let me go?” Castiel asked, his fingers tightening on the hilt of the knife.

 

“You aren’t my prisoner, Cas,” came Dean’s reply, still cool as ever.

Cas sheathed the knife at his belt.

 

“Thank you,” he said quietly, and he was surprised by the sincerity he felt at those words.

No matter how evil this creature was, it was still capable of undoing at least one of his failures.

Dean was quiet.

Castiel didn’t expect an answer anyway. He didn’t look back as he hurried to his car parked a few feet away.

Better to run before he changes his mind.

He risked a quick glance back when he reached his Lincoln Continental. Dean was gone.

The abandoned road looked peaceful and lonely as it was before.

Except for the now-ruined devil's trap and some residues of burnt offerings, everything seemed normal. 

No one would know that a man lost his soul here. 

 

Castiel fumbled with the car keys and stumbled inside. He rubbed his eyes tiredly as he laid his head on the steering wheel.

“Fuck… what have I done…” he groaned.

 

**_“I looked around! And I knew there was no turning back!”_ **

 

With the most unmanly squeak, Castiel whipped around his head around so fast, he was sure he popped some of his veins in his neck.

 

The car radio buzzed as it adjusted on its own, blasting AC/DC at the highest volume.

 

**_“My mind raced! And I thought what could I do!”_ **

 

Dean grinned at him from the passenger seat, his fist in the air, caught in the middle of a fist pump.

His head was banging along with the beat as he sang at the top of his longs.

Castiel just stared at him.

 

**_“And I KNEW! There was no help, no help from YOU!”_ **

 

Dean pumped the air a few times before turning dramatically as he could in the cramped passenger seat, pointing two index fingers at Castiel.

 

 **“ _Thunder!”_**   The radio sang at him, while Cas continued to gape at Dean.

 

“Aww, dude! That was _your_ part! You missed it!” Dean pouted as the song went on.

 

“What are you doing?” Castiel finally managed to splutter.

 

Dean’s smile turned goofier as he continued to jerk his head with the rhythm.

 

“AC/DC, man! This is the shit!” Dean shouted over the ear-splitting rock music.

Dean must have used his demon magic since Cas’s poor radio speakers were now howling at the level of concert amplifiers.

 

“You said you will let me go!” Castiel shouted back, covering his ears as the electronic guitar threatened to split his eardrums.

 

“I am!” Dean yelled, his smile turning wider. “But I never said you are going alone!”

 

Dean threw back his head and laughed as Cas regarded with Dean with the most horrified expression.

 

 ** _“You’ve been…… Thunderstruck! Thunderstruck!”_** The radio screamed.

 

* * *

 

 

The part Dean sings starts at around 1:10 (if the link works, the video should start from there)  
[Thunderstruck ](https://youtu.be/v2AC41dglnM?t=70) by AC/DC

 

 *Dean jamming out*

 

 *Cas: Fuck My Life*

 

xD

 

 

 


	4. Just a friend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of plot development and new character appearance! Yay!  
> The right way to start a new year, am I right?  
> Happy New Year! Love you guys xoxo

Anna Novak gasped as she opened her eyes. She breathed in gulps of air as her dry lungs started to function again. Her whole body felt like it was burned with fire— there was not one square meter of her body that didn’t ache.

 

“Ugh…” she groaned, trying to turn her head to the side.

 

“Anna? Anna? Honey?”A rustle of clothes and hasty footsteps rang through her brain as someone appeared in her sight.

 

She grimaced as the voices rang in her ear uncomfortably. A familiar face peered down at her worriedly, eyes wide.

 

“It’s alright child, you are safe now,” she whispered.

 

“So many voices…” Anna whimpered, squeezing her eyes shut, as her eyes started to sting and water.

“So many of them. They won’t stop. They won’t stop…”

Her head felt like it was splitting open as images flashed in front her. White lights and inhuman screeches repeated itself over and over again, making her hard to even stay conscious.

 

“Castiel... they are coming for him,” she gasped as she tried to sit upright.

Something was wrong, terribly wrong. She could feel it in her gut.

 

“Now, now, there is no way you are getting up already,” the woman said firmly, holding her down by her shoulders.

A strict yet a gentle touch, like a mother’s.

 

“I have to get Cas,” Anna wheezed, still struggling to get her body upright with no success.

 

“I…have…to…” Anna’s eyes slowly slid shut as exhaustion overcame her.

 

The woman tutted as she felt Anna’s forehead again, which was damp from sweat. But still, her body was warm and alive.

It was merely hours before when her body was cold and pale, laying like a ragdoll.

Only hours before Castiel stormed out of the house, tight-lipped and eyes burning with determination.

Missouri sighed and dropped heavily into the armchair next to the bed, her head in her palms.

 

“What have you done, my boy?”

 

* * *

“You are not going in there.”

 

Dean squinted at the glowering human barring his way in. He still looks adorable when he’s mad, he thought again.

 

“I can do whatever I want. I am a demon,” he shot back, taking another step closer to the door.

 

“All the more reason why,” Cas growled, taking a step back, blocking the entryway.

The lapels of his black trench coat fluttered around him like wings.

 

“Well, what am I supposed to do then? Wait in _the_ _car_?” Dean spat with disgust.

 

“Yes!” Castiel exclaimed as he threw up his hands, exasperated.

 

“In your _Lincoln_? No way, uh-uh.”

 

Castiel frowned at him. “What’s so wrong with my car?”

 

“Like… _all_ of it? One hour drive in that crappy piece of junk you call a car is enough.”

 

“For the last time, it’s _not_ crappy. And don’t you dare-”

 

“Ahem.”

 

A gentle throat clearing stopped their argument short as they were greeted by a middle-aged black woman wearing a black dress and a soft striped sweater. Even though she was shorter than both them, under her stern gaze and crossed arms, both men felt like little boys before a scolding.

 

“Missouri,” Castiel greeted her. He knew from her tight lip and a slight crease between her brows that she expected what happened. A deal. An irrevocable damnation.

 

“Who’s your friend here?” Missouri jerked her head towards Dean.

 

“A fellow hunter, ma’am,” Dean said smoothly before Castiel could come up with an explanation.

 

“My car broke down on my way home but Cas, my buddy here-”

he slapped Cas between his shoulder blades, making him jump in surprise.

Dean just smiled at him charmingly and then at Missouri, as they were old pals, used to this sort of things.

 

“-was kind enough to pick me up on the road.” Dean seemed to have changed into a totally different person.

His posture more relaxed and welcoming, as if he was just a friendly neighbor downstreet.

Easy-going and polite, just a charming Texas lad.

Missouri raised an eyebrow at him questioningly as she swept him from head to toe.

Missouri wasn’t easy to fool. Castiel was sure she felt something was off.

 

“My boy here is sometimes a bit _too_ kind,” Missouri huffed slightly, fixing Castiel a glare that said we-will-talk-about-this-later.

 

“He sure is,” Dean didn’t miss a beat as he squeezed Cas’s shoulders, smiling lazily at him.

Cas just wished Dean had just dragged him to hell already.

 

“I won’t be a bother for too long, ma’am,” Dean continued smoothly.

His accent never faltered and his green eyes shined with cheerful innocence. If Castiel didn't know better, he would have believed Dean without a doubt.

 

“Cas says he’s gonna leave tomorrow so I will just get a quick ride from him then.”

It was too easy to miss but Cas saw a small quirk of Dean’s lips, his smile turning into a leer. Cas did his best to ignore the innuendo.

 

“Is he now?” Missouri turned to Cas, her eyes widening with surprise.

 

The hand gripping Castiel’s shoulder tightened. A warning to play along.

 

“Yes, unfortunately,” Castiel replied stiffly.

 

Missouri stared at him, dumbfounded.

 

“Busy, busy man you got here,” Dean laughed, tightening his hold on Castiel as he dragged him past Missouri into the open house.

 

“What are you doing?” Cas hissed as soon as Missouri was out of earshot.

 

“It’s called having a conversation. You should try it sometime.” 

 

* * *

Castiel's actual car in Supernatural aka the "Pimp mobile" (1978 Lincoln Continental Mark V)

 Missouri Mosely

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I put Cas's car as a Prius last chapter but it was a wrong reference so I changed it to Lincoln. Hope no one noticed xD


	5. Past Never Dies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning for mild dub-con  
> A bit longer chapter this time! Wowza! ^^  
> Sorry for spelling and grammar mistakes I might have missed!

“How long?”

 

Castiel couldn’t bear to look at Missouri so he just stared at Anna’s sleeping form instead. The rise and fall of her chest, the slight roll of her eyelids while she sleeps. Missouri didn’t even have to elaborate on the question. Castiel knew what she was asking. How much he had left. He even considered telling her the truth.

That the knight and prince of hell who will drag him down to hell is right next door, munching on a bag of chips.

 

But Castiel knew that it wouldn’t change anything. He also didn’t want to risk what Dean would do if he told her. He couldn’t put any more of his family in danger. 

“One month,” he lied.

 

“You stupid, stubborn ass boy,” Missouri sighed.

 

“I had no choice,” Cas cast his eyes down and clasped his hands together.

 

“The dead are supposed to stay dead, Castiel. You had a choice to accept, to move on, to—"

 

“To what?” Cas said sharply, finally raising his eyes to meet Missouri’s bloodshot eyes.

 

“For what, Missouri? She had no part in this life. It was _my_ choice- _my_ decision to go see her. It was _my_ fault that she died! All because of my own selfishness.”

Castiel faltered, shame overcoming him.

 

“I should have died in her place.” He whispered. “At least something good will come out of—”

 

“Cut that crap out right now, mister!”

 

Even before he finished his sentence, Missouri was grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him.

“I didn’t raise you like this, boy! Have you got that low of an opinion of yourself?”

 

“I. Destroy. Everything.” Castiel also lashed out, each of his words full with self-hatred.

“It’s better this way. I will be able to finish this god-forsaken Quest. I have nothing to lose.”

 

“Didn’t you think about anyone else? How is your sister gonna feel when she knows you are going to hell?” Missouri gestured at Anna who was sleeping soundly few feet away.

 

“You can’t tell her,” Castiel gripped her wrist, locking eyes with her. His glassy blue eyes pleading.

 

“You have to promise me. Please. Whatever you do, you can’t tell Anna.”

Missouri locked eyes with Castiel. A heavy silent conversation passed through them. A tear fell down her cheek as she nodded half-heartedly, grabbing Castiel in a tight embrace.

 

“May the Gods be with you, son,” she murmured when she finally let Castiel go.

 

Castiel smiled back at her sadly.

 

“The Gods were never there.”  

 

* * *

 

Dean stared at the empty bag of chips and a half-full beer bottle in his hands. He felt the bottle around in his hand and brought it to his lips again. He felt the taste of cool liquor down his tongue and throat.

He thought he had forgotten earth completely. He was sure that he did. Time moved much slower in hell than on earth. In the midst of the never-ending screams and stale scent of blood, he couldn’t remember even the simplest joys on earth.

Dean drank the last drop of alcohol, savoring its bitterness. He never thought he would appreciate the taste this cheap beer. But now, it felt like ambrosia.

He set the empty bottle down on the table with a slight thud. Dean stared at the lonely bottle standing at the edge of the table. He vaguely remembered the time when there was another bottle next to it.

 

 

“ _A bottle for you too, Sammy?”_

_“Dean, you can’t drink only beer for dinner.”_

_“Says the rabbit food muncher.”_

_“It’s called a salad. And this is an_ **_actual_ ** _food, unlike yours.”_

_“Whatever, bitch.”_

_“Jerk.”_

 

Dean shook his head as he woke up from his memory. It was all in the past. Much has changed since.

He shifted his senses, focusing on Cas. He felt Cas in a room upstairs. The older woman wasn’t with him, probably in another room, with his sister.

It meant Cas was alone.

Perfect.

 

He transported himself in black smoke, appearing in the corner of the room. Castiel had his back to him, looking down at something that Dean couldn’t see.

 

“Whatcha got there, Cas?”

 

Castiel jumped almost a feet in the air, hurriedly hiding something in his pockets. He cleared his throat and smoothed down the lapels of his trenchcoat. He glared at the uninvited intruder.

 

“People usually come in after they knock.” He huffed, crossing his arms together.

 

“I’m not your usual type of human,” Dean chuckled, amused at the human’s behavior.

 

“But you still act like a teenager caught watching porn,” Dean smirked, slowly advancing on Castiel, stalking him like a predator would to his prey.

Slow, easy steps, but with intent.

Castiel’s glared at him a bit more, his jaw clenched.

“It’s nothing.”

 

“I am a demon, Cas. I know when you are lying.” Cas flinched. So easy, Dean thought. He liked the way pink was spreading on Castiel's cheeks, in a way only a human can blush.

 

“It’s nothing a demon would care about,” Cas murmured dismissively, turning away from Dean.

 

Dean growled, low and feral as something in him snapped at that word.

 

“I will be the one to judge,” Dean snarled.

 

He was on him in an instant, moving faster than light as he pounced on Castiel.

 

Cas grunted at the impact, too surprised at the sudden attack. But he was quick to recover, bracing himself with his arms and kicking out.

He was obviously very well-trained for a hunter.

The hard end of his boot actually got Dean in the knee.

“Fuck!” Dean winced. But it was more from annoyance than pain. Dean struck Castiel hard below the ribs, taking his breath away. Dean seized the moment to grab hold of the human’s wrist, twisting in the best angle to cause pain, but not to break. Castiel cried out, the pain blinding him for a split second.

The demon slammed his body against the wall so that his back was to his chest. He twisted one arm behind his back in the process, immobilizing him. He pressed his body against his, leaving him no chance of escape.

 

Castiel gasped, struggling slightly, but Dean just squeezed a bit tighter around his wrist in warning.

 

Dean leaned forward so that his lips were in line with the juncture of Castiel’s neck. His nosed Castiel’s curly black hair at the back of his head, reveling in the softness of it. He breathed out slowly on the side of his neck, and Castiel froze, his whole body tensing under him.

 

“You don’t wanna know what a demon really cares about, sweetheart,” he whispered.

 

To accentuate his point, he grinded on the hunter’s firm, round ass, once—a small but well-aimed thrust. He was already half-hard from the fight, adrenaline pumping through his veins. The friction was so delicious that he had to fight the urge to take the human right then and there.

 

Castiel gasped. “No…” A small breathless plea escaped him before he could stop it.

 

Dean just hummed. His free hand roamed Castiel’s sides as they traveled lower, lower, down his body. Dean brushed the sharp hipbones hiding under the plain suit pants.

Castiel bit his lower lip, refusing to give in to the urge to whimper.

 

He felt Dean’s finger tease inside the seam of his pants, their bare skins making contact. The demon probed further, tugging at the fabric, pulling, pulling down--

 

Then suddenly, Dean’s weight on him disappeared from him all at once as he stepped back from Castiel’s space.

Castiel let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, stumbling as he turned around.

 

Dean looked down confusedly at the thing in his palm. He had teased it out of Castiel’s pockets—the ones he was so adamant to hide earlier.

The item was very unexpected, to say the least.

 

A silver necklace lay on his palm. A small pendant mixed with black, yellow, and white jewels was attached at the end of the chain, taking the form of a bee with wings.

 

“What’s this?” Dean asked, confused. He toyed with the pendant between his thumb and index finger, examining it.

 

“Anna gave it to me when I was little.”

 

Dean looked up at Castiel. The human’s face was flushed pink and his hair seemed to have got messier if that was possible.

The end of his black trench coat was in tangles, but he already adjusted the rest of his clothing. His eyes were downcast, hiding his blue eyes behind his long, dark lashes.

 

“More like stole it actually,” Cas huffed. The end of his lips twitched upward as if he found the memory amusing. Dean stared at the slight upward slope of his lips, wondering how they would look when he was fully smiling.

 

“She knew I like bees.”  

 

Dean felt something uneasy in his chest as a flash of memory hit him again. This time, the memory was foggier, as if it was more worn out over the years.

 

 

_"Happy birthday, Dean!"_

_"Thanks, Sammy. You know you didn’t have to."_

_"But I wanted to! I got something for you! See?_ _If you wear it, God will protect you wherever you go."_

_"Wow, this is really awesome kiddo! Thank you."_

_"Promise you will always wear it, Dean?"_

_"Always."_

 

 

Dean blinked a couple of times. Where did that flashback come from? It was so long ago, he couldn’t even place when it happened.

He looked down at the necklace again. His heart clenching at the strange feeling. He didn’t like the way it ached.

Like something that was crushed and unforgotten at the bottom of his heart was trying to claw its way back out again. 

 

“Was it worth it?” Dean's voice was so quiet that Castiel thought he imagined it.

 

Castiel frowned at looked at the demon. “What?”

 

“Her life. Was it worth your soul?”

 

Dean shifted his gaze from the pendant and met his eyes. His eyes were very human green, Castiel thought, reminiscent of the soft grass fields of spring.

They were the most beautiful eyes Castiel ever saw. Even if they belonged to a demon. They went along very well with Dean's strong jawline and high cheekbones. 

They also brought out his lips, full and pink as if they were—

Castiel managed to look away before he could be hypnotized by Dean’s features. 

 

“Yes.” Castiel murmured. And many times more, he thought silently.

 

“You are willing to suffer through eternity in hell all to save one life?” Dean questioned, his voice laced with… Doubt? Sadness? Anger?

Castiel wasn’t sure. Why is he asking this? Is he pitying him?

 

“I doubt demons like you would understand,” he snapped. He didn’t need a demon’s pity.

“But I can’t just let my sister die.” He answered with finality, his hands clenched into fists at his sides.

 

“I will do whatever it takes.”

 

Dean stilled. He remembered one time, long ago, that he echoed those exact words.

The ones he failed to prove.

Just like this human will do the same.  

 

“You’d better fucking believe that.” He said quietly.

His eyes turned demon black, like a mask over his eyes. His heart no longer felt like it was breaking. It was cold and unmoving again, like the ones of an immortal creature.

It was better this way. No feelings, no weaknesses, no complications.

Dean smiled.

 

“'Cause it's time to hold _your_ end of the bargain.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's gonna happen next??? *wiggles eyebrows*
> 
> I think I am going to update weekly from now on but I have a very irregular posting schedule... sorry  
> subscribe if you want to get updates :P  
> xoxo


	6. Call Me Master

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What we've ALL BEEN WAITING FOOOOOR!!!
> 
> Warnings: Dub-con

As a knight of hell, Dean tortured countless souls. All of them, begging, pleading at his feet for an ounce of mercy as he held his First blade in hand. Dean came to them with black eyes, bull-like horns standing tall and proud on his head. The mark of Cain glowed bright red as he advanced.

Even with the sight alone, when he was not even in his true form, the humans trembled. Hell rumbled when Dean descended into the Pit, ready to reap, ready to make the darkest nightmares into life. They started on their knees, tears running down their cheeks as they pleaded for their lives.Dean sneered at them, raising his blade to bring it down without hesitation.

That was how he got his well-earned name in Hell. The Master of the Pit.

And Master he shall be.

 

Dean felt the mark on his forearm light up in excitement. Finally, the demon purred.

Dean involuntarily took a step forward.

The First blade tucked into the back of his belt vibrated in union with the mark.

Another step.

The mark urged him to kill, singing for blood.

Another step closer.

Let go! The Mark screamed at him. Kill! Take him!

 

Dean gave in.

 

The first blade flew to his hand as if it was coming home, fitting into his palm perfectly. Dean charged, his eyes focusing only on the neck of the human before him. The next moment, the blade was pressed against Castiel’s tan skin, right below his Adam's apple.

Just a press and a slash away. It will be that easy. But then Dean made a mistake of meeting the human’s eyes. Castiel, just another human, another soul, stood before him, at his mercy. But he did not cower, and he did not run. His posture never broke, his breathing did not quicken, and he only held his head higher. His blue eyes were like the ocean waves, crashing into the rocky shore defiantly. He glared at Dean challengingly, daring him.

 

And Dean wanted nothing more than to break him.

 

Something slammed into the center of his chest, catching Dean off guard. Dean looked down. Castiel had stabbed with his demon knife. The hilt of the dagger was protruding from his chest.

Guess he didn’t give the human enough credit that he deserved.

“Aren’t you a sneaky motherfucker,” he reached down with his free hand and pulled the blade out with a grunt. The shit stung like a bitch. Dean tossed it aside.

“Pretty boys like you shouldn’t play with knives.” Dean taunted, pressing his first blade down harder. A fine line of scarlet appeared on Castiel’s throat. Dean eyed the droplet of blood hungrily and licked his lips. How would he taste?

Dean surged forward on impulse and licked the wound with his tongue. Castiel gasped, surprised. The blood disappeared on Dean’s tongue, leaving a stale taste of iron.

“Wha- What are you doing?” Castiel stammered as Dean started licking and sucking on Castiel’s neck. Castiel’s hands gripped Dean’s leather jacket, trying to push him away. Dean ignored him as he nibbled at the human’s jugular. A groan escaped from Castiel before he bit down on his bottom lip to stop it.

“I am starting to think this is a better way of payment,” Dean dropped the First Blade and slid his hands down the human’s torso, kneading his ass through his pants. His mouth latched onto the pulse point, sucking and biting.

Castiel gasped again, and Dean felt him tremble at his touch.

“Ah! S-stop…” The hunter stammered, his grip tightening on Dean’s jacket.

“Stop? You want me to stop?” Dean murmured, one hand soothingly stroking the human’s sides. His own skin felt too hot against the human’s skin as if electricity was pulsing with every touch. He slid his thigh between Cas’s legs and was surprised to find him hard.

Dean smirked against Castiel’s shoulder.

“Well this part-” Dean rubbed against Cas’s erection with his thigh. A groan came out of the human’s lips. What a pretty sound, Dean thought.

“Disagrees with you.”

The heat inside was pants was getting uncomfortable, with Dean’s hardness straining against his jeans. Dean rutted against Cas, their groins connecting, giving them the friction that they both needed. They moaned in union, pleasure overcoming their senses.

“Still want me to stop, sweetheart?” Dean started undoing the buttons of Castiel’s shirt, the knuckles of his hands brushing with the soft skin underneath. Dean peaked a glance at Castiel, waiting for an answer.

Castiel’s eyes were clenched closed, hiding his beautiful eyes from him. But Dean was proud to see how disheveled he was. His lips were pink and wet from him biting down on it so much. A light flush stained his cheeks, his breaths coming out in short pants.

“I… I don’t…” Castiel let out a strangled sound in frustration as he thrust forward, now fully hard erection brushing against Dean’s thigh. He hated how his body responded to the demon, almost as if it was out of his own volition.

“What? Should we stop?” Dean teased, still pressing close to his body, his fingers exploring his chest. He found a nipple and pinched it between his fingertips.

The hunter's body arched at his touch, responding to him.

Dean growled appreciatively, as his other hand came to cup Cas's dick through his pants. 

Castiel suddenly twisted under him, one of his foot hooking under Dean’s ankle. Dean didn’t have time to react as Castiel swept him off the floor by his feet. Dean hit the floor with a thud, landing with Castiel on top of him.

 

“Ow!” Dean hissed as the hard floor chafed his behind.

Castiel was now straddling his chest, trapping each of Dean’s wrists in his iron grip. Half of Castiel’s black shirt was hanging open, showing the rapid rise and fall of his chest.

“Don’t fucking touch me,” Castiel spat.

Dea snorted. The audacity of him. He was actually impressed.

“Stop lying to yourself, Cas,” Dean purred. He smiled and licked the front of his teeth with his tongue.

“You _want_ me. I can feel it in your eyes, your skin, your heartbeat…” Dean looked down at Castiel’s pants where the bulge was still evident through his pants. Dean grinned.

“And more importantly, dicks don’t lie.”  

Dean bucked his hips up and rolled them, startling Cas. He escaped Cas’s punch but he couldn’t avoid a jab to his ribs. Dean hissed. Fucking stubborn bastard.  

“One more trick like that and your sister will drop dead cold on the floor- deal or no deal.”

Dean snarled, annoyed and aroused at the same time. He had successfully made his way between Cas’s legs, holding both of his arms above his head. It was much like the way they kissed at the crossroads.

“Don’t you dare lay a finger on her!” Cas glared up at him indignantly.  

“Aren’t you a brave piece of ass.” Dean chuckled.

“Too bad you aren’t in a position to order me around.”

He yanked rest of Castiel’s shirt open, ripping the buttons out as he admired the human’s flat, chiseled stomach. He let go of Cas’s hands to yank the shirt and his trench coat down his shoulders. Castiel flinched but didn’t move, allowing Dean to do as he pleased.

“After all, _every. Inch. of you_.” Dean trailed his index finger down Castiel’s naked chest.

“Is mine.”  

Dean dragged the coat down behind the hunter, leaving Castiel’s arms trapped in his sleeves when his clothes bunched up behind his back. A flutter of excitement coiled in Dean’s stomach as he beheld the human under him—pilant, immobile.

“Hey, if it makes you feel comfy-” Dean winked down at him.

“You can call me master.”

 

Castiel’s eyes were mere slits as he glared up at Dean with probably all the curses he knew. Dean just smirked and fumbled with Castiel’s belt, suddenly frustrated with the too many layers between their bodies. He needs the hunter naked- now.

Dean pulled down Castiel’s white boxers to let his cock spring free. Dean’s mouth watered immediately as he saw the long, thick member oozing precum. Dean licked his lips. His human certainly didn’t disappoint. Dean roughly pulled the frustrating pants away, leaving Castiel completely naked except for his makeshift trench-coat-binds.

Dean crawled in between Castiel’s parted legs and glanced up at him. His eyes were clenched so tight that a deep crease formed on his forehead. His lips were parted but his head was facing to the side as if he wanted to hide from everything that was happening down below.

Dean wondered how he would look when he was staring up at him, open-mouthed, his eyes blown wide with lust, screaming his name as he begged for more. He will have to work hard to break him to that point.

But for now, Dean licked his palm, making it wet before circling his fingers around Cas’s dick, expertly working him with a jerk of his wrist. Dean bent over Cas to bring his dick to his mouth, licking at the slit, tasting the bitterness. A shudder went through Cas and Dean repeated the action again, swirling his tongue around the crown. He sucked at the sensitive skin lightly so that his lips were now wrapped around the cockhead.

Castiel bucked slightly, unable to move his hands from his sides. His jaw was clenched with the effort to not moan. Dean hummed. He didn’t even get started.

Dean swirled his tongue at the slit one more time before swallowing him down to the root, letting the cockhead hit the back of his throat.

“Fuck!” Cas cursed as Dean sucked, wrapping his lips tighter around him. He bobbed his head up and down, licking and sucking on every chance he got.

Cas moaned above him, his breaths coming out in small pants as he started thrusting up to Dean’s mouth. They were first shallow thrusts as if he was trying to hold back, trying to regain the last bit of control he had. Dean was grateful for his non-existing gag reflex as he let his mouth slack, letting Cas fuck into his mouth.

Dean felt the muscles of Cas’s stomach tightening, his thrusts got rougher as he pounded into Dean’s mouth. Dean felt a sense of victory as Cas started moaning above him, his back arching as he searched for release.

But Dean immediately pulled off with a wet pop, squeezing tightly around the base of his shaft.

“Ah-ah!” The human cried out, his body jerking as he was yanked away from his orgasm.

“Bad boy’s don’t get to come until Master says so,” Dean tutted, wiping some excess spit from his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Go to hell,” Castiel snapped at him, his face now flushed pink and his hair messier than ever.

“Only if you come with, angel,”

Dean replied sweetly as he went back down Cas again, licking a lewd stripe up his shaft from bottom to top. He started a vicious rhythm again, using his hand and mouth to work Castiel to the edge. He squeezed and cupped his balls, bringing out the filthiest groans from the human. Dean felt his own dick aching, seeking for some friction, but Dean ignored it, focusing on the stubborn hunter writhing under him.

Dean brought him to the brink again, and again, each time easier as Castiel was getting oversensitive. Every time, Dean stopped him with a hard squeeze, and every time Castiel’s cries got a little bit more desperate. Dean pushed Castiel’s legs wider apart, holding the trembling limbs still with ease as he nibbled on the inside of his thighs.

“Still don’t want me to touch you?” Dean teased, avoiding Castiel’s rock hard dick that was slowly turning purple.

Castiel panted as he feebly shook his head, his eyes clenched closed and his head thrown back from the overwhelming sensation. His whole body was covered with sweat as he struggled against his own trench coat, arching up to Dean.

“I need words, Cas,” Dean murmured, kissing up his hipbones and taut abs while he circled Cas’s perky entrance with his thumb.

“Mmmph… please…” Cas whispered, his hips jerking as his whole body trembled.

“Please what?” Dean caught his nipple between his teeth, biting it lightly.

“Ah! Please…” Cas babbled, tears gathering the edge of his eyes. It was too much, too much…

“Please let me come,” Cas breathed out, succumbing to his needs, any sense of dignity lost.

“Then come,” Dean said as a matter-of-factly.

Castiel’s eyes flew open as he stared at Dean in disbelief.

“What's the matter?” Dean asked innocently. 

“You need something more?” 

“What happened to...  _don’t fucking touch me?_ ” Dean asked, his voice dripping with sweetness as he lapped and bit along Castiel’s collarbone.

“Ah- I…” Castiel clenched his eyes shut. He wanted him to beg.

His mouth worked before his resolve could stop him.

“P-please. Touch me.”

Dean smirked, satisfied with the progress they made. He won. Again.

He wasted no time in fisting around Castiel, stroking him up and down vigorously. Castiel cried out, his whole body locking up as he finally came within a few seconds. Dean growled, watching the human’s seed spurt and drip on his fingers.

Castiel was shaking through the orgasm, whimpering at the feeling.

“Good boy,” Dean growled, watching Cas all splayed before him, eyes half-lidded and throat bared as his head was thrown back. He almost tore his pants to pieces as he freed his aching dick, ruthlessly pleasuring himself, using Castiel’s cum as lube.

Castiel could barely keep his eyes open as he saw Dean coming in a handful of strokes, coming all over Castiel’s stomach and chest. Marking him his.

Castiel watched as Dean moaned as the orgasm hit him, waves of ecstasy running through his body. Dean’s eyes were scrunched tight with pleasure, his wet lips slightly parted. He opened his eyes, revealing the emeralds again. Dean met his eyes and for a split second, Cas thought he saw a flicker of gold in them, burning bright like flames.

“So fucking good, angel,” Dean was murmuring, his pupils blown wide, out of focus.

“So good— _All for me,_ ” Dean leaned above him, pressing down on the center of his chest. His other hand came to cup his cheek, holding him so tenderly like he actually cared for him.

“Gotta have you.” Dean shuddered, a strange crazed look in his eyes.

“Gotta have you _now_.”

Something searing hot and blindingly bright erupted from his chest, burning him from the inside. It felt like he was being torn atom by atom, each of them exploding in his body. Castiel had never felt such pain. There was so much light—brighter than the sun, almost burning his eyes, into his skull even though his eyes were clenched closed. He wanted to scream but he wasn’t able to as the painful shocks tore through him again and again.

Castiel was glad when the light ended and darkness took him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seriously, smut is a b*tch to write... kudoses to all the people who wrote all the delicious smuts that became my bedtime story *wink wink*  
> This is the first smut I ever wrote so... I hope you guys enjoy!


	7. Haunted Memories

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm SO VERY SORRY for my late update!   
> I kind of had a writer's block. But I came back with quite long chapter this time!  
> I hope this makes up for my absence!  
> Also, just to make things clear, the /italics/ part indicate memories or dreams or visions.

_ Something was in his house. He could feel it. Castiel’s eyes flew open as he felt a shiver running down his spine. Where was he? He felt disoriented and everything around him felt fuzzy. He rubbed his eyes as he slid off the bed, which felt ginormous, with some extra enormous... Actually, everything around him felt bigger than usual.  _

_ As soon as his bare feet hit the wooden floor with a slight thud, he heard a rustle from the other side of the room. _

_ “Cas?”  _

_ Castiel jerked and turned around to see a small, slim figure standing in the darkness- a small red-headed girl in white pajamas. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, breathing out slowly. _

_ “Anna,” Cas whispered, tiptoeing over to her side.  _

_ Even in the darkness, he could see that she was shivering from head to toe. She wrapped her bony arms around Castiel when he came close enough, pressing her head to Cas’s ribcage.  _

_ “I… I had a- another dream…” She stuttered into her brother’s chest. _

_ Castiel shushed her, hugging her tight. “Everything’s going to be okay, Anna,” he said confidently, ignoring the way his own voice quivered in favor of comforting his sister. _

_ “Let’s go see mum, she’ll-”  _

_ A blood-curdling scream erupted from downstairs, drowning Castiel’s words and freezing both siblings in place. Something crashed and more demented shrieking came from downstairs as the whole house seemed to rattle and shake.  _

_ “Castiel! Anna!”  _

_ Cas could hear the rushed footsteps as their bedroom door was thrown open seconds after. Their mother was standing there, out of breath, and with blood running down her forehead. Her usually tidy auburn hair was roughed up as if someone yanked her roughly by the hair. She was holding a small but deadly knife in her hand.  _

_ “Mo-mom?” Castiel curled into himself, wrapping his arms more tightly around his sister.   _

_ “ Castiel, you have to take your sister and run! Now! He’s -” _

_ A dark shadow came creeping up behind her, and Anna screamed, her eyes wide as her mother was hurled to the other corner of the room. She hit the wall with a sickening thud, slumping down against the wall. _

 

_ “Well, well, well… What do we have here?” A horribly familiar face stared down at Castiel, only now, his father’s eyes were dark pools of black.  _

_ “Mmm… young souls are my favorite! You’ll make a tasty dessert.” The demon inside his father’s body purred, its lips twisting into a savage, psychotic grin. _

_ “You… won’t… touch… them,” his mother wheezed behind it, and the demon’s eyes snapped back to the woman.  _

_ “Ha! Still alive, eh? I do like my meals feisty.”  _

_ The demon licked its lips and then pounced on her, claws unsheathing with a wicked screech. Castiel watched in shock, unable to move as she struggled, kicking and punching at the demon who pinned her down with its body. The knife was knocked out from her hands, the blade skidding across the room, landing a couple of feet away from Castiel.  _

_ “Argh! Fucking bitch!” The demon screamed as the woman clawed at its face. Its hands were pressed against his mother’s chest and Castiel watched in horror as bright light burst from her.  Its whole arm seemed to enter her body as she writhed under it. _

_ And then… _

 

**_Crack._ **

 

_ The sound seemed to ring through Castiel’s whole body as he heard the snap of his mother’s spine. Time seemed to have slowed down as he saw the light fade from her beautiful blue eyes. His mother was dead.  _

_ And that was when Castiel broke out of his shock. His mother was dead. He had to protect his sister. She only had him now. Castiel didn’t know what came over him then, only feeling raw determination to protect. He lunged for the knife with gritted teeth. The next few moments were a blur- he felt the metal blade cutting into his palm, his wrists, he felt the blood flowing down, he felt his fingers becoming slippery- he dropped to his knees. He barely heard Anna behind him, shaking his shoulders wildly. _

_ Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the demon stand up, kicking his mother’s body aside. Its coal-black eyes then settled on… Anna. _

_ “Hello there, pretty girl.” He started stepping towards them, his posture now relaxed.  _

_ “Why don’t you come to daddy?” The demon cackled.  _

_ “Leave her alone!” he shouted, his voice cracking as his throat ached. The demon snorted, about to roll its eyes before stopping suddenly. An unreadable expression came over its face. _

_ “Wha- what are you doing?” _

_ Castiel looked down at the floor. He saw his small, shaking fingers drenched in blood. He had created a large circle with shapes inside them on the floor. He couldn’t make sense of any of the things he drew. But he knew—he just knew what to do.  _

_ He slammed his bloody palm against the center of the circle.  _

_ The demon howled as its body was suddenly lit aflame. A red light shot out from its body as it convulsed, falling to the floor. And Castiel could never forget how his father screamed as his body burned from inside out. The scream echoed endlessly in his head, tearing through his mind, splitting his eardrums, choking him until he— _

 

 

“Cas? Cas!!” 

 

Castiel woke up, his whole body covered in cold sweat. His breath came out in short pants as he sat up, trying to reach for his demon knife by instinct. Someone was on top of him, pushing him down. Castiel meekly protested, still disoriented from waking up. Then he recognized the green-eyed creature sitting on him. 

Dean was frowning down at him with a little crease in his eyebrows. Now this close, Castiel could see that Dean had freckles— dozens of them on his cheeks and nose. How did each of them end up in such artful positions? Castiel pondered sleepily.

“Cas!” Dean hissed as Castiel’s eyes started to get out of focus. The demon shook him by his shoulders, trying to get his attention. 

“Am I dead?” Castiel asked, his words coming out more slurred than he wanted it to be. 

  
Dean snorted at that, rolling his eyes and finally letting go of Castiel. 

“You think hell will be all vanilla like this? Seriously?” 

“You… you killed me.” Cas mumbled, trying to fight his droopy eyelids. His vision started to grow hazy. Dean was silent for a moment. 

“I almost did.” 

Dean said quietly. There was something in his voice that Castiel couldn’t place. For one crazy moment, Dean looked guilty. Castiel sleepily looked up at the demon, tilting his head as much he could while lying down. Dean realized by now that it was a habit of the strange human. 

“Why didn’t you?”

“I don’t like backing out on promises.” He simply grunted.  Then he just shoved a mug into the hunter’s hands, which Castiel didn’t realize he was holding.

“Drink up. Don’t you have a revenge killing spree to go to?”

Castiel looked down at the steaming cup of coffee in his hands. Before he could say anything else Dean vanished, leaving a trail of black smoke in his absence. Castiel stared at the spot Dean was sitting seconds before, wondering if he was still dreaming.

 

* * *

 

 

Anna decided that she was never going to go drinking again. Her head felt weird and her mouth felt so dry. She also felt like her whole body was freezing over. She blinked as she took in her surroundings. She was definitely not in her dorm, but she recognized her room- the one she left behind. What was she doing here? Did she get so drunk that her friends decided to call Missouri? 

 

She stumbled downstairs to grab some water, only to end up freezing to a stop with a shriek as she saw a strange man sitting in the kitchen. His eyes snapped up to her,  both eyebrows raised. It was not  quite in a stare of surprise, but more of a thoughtful scrutiny.  He had his mouth full of food as he slowly munched on, a full stack of pancakes drenched in syrup and whipped cream in front of him. His eyes ran over her body approvingly in that brief moment, and even though she was fully clothed, she felt naked as ever.  She whirled as hurried footsteps came from behind her. Castiel burst into the kitchen, his eyes wide with alarm. 

“Is everything alright? I thought I heard-” 

He came to a stop when he saw Anna and Dean. An awkward silence hung in the air as her brother just stared at her. Then before Anna could say anything else, Castiel lurched forward, crushing her in a bear hug. 

“Anna, thank goodness.” He sighed in relief as he held his little sister tight. 

“Owww… Uh, Cas…” Anna winced as she felt a piercing pain in her ribs. 

Castiel immediately stepped away from her as he held her at arm's length as if she was a precious fragile artifact that might break. 

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m just… happy to see you, that’s all.” 

He ducked his head, looking at her timidly as he fidgeted. He clenched and unclenched his hands before lowering them to his sides. 

 

“We haven’t seen each other for a while.” He said quietly, tracking her expressions through his lashes as if he was a small child being scolded. 

“...Yeah.” Anna replied lamely, also ducking her head to the side. Her eyes landed once again on the strange man, who was watching them as he would a soap opera.

“Who’s this?” She directed the attention to anywhere else so that she wouldn’t have to deal with her brother. 

“O-oh. Um, that’s Dean. Someone I helped yesterday.” Castiel stuttered.   Was his brother blushing? Anna wondered as Castiel awkwardly stood there, gazing anywhere but the strange man.

Dean greeted her with a wink and a smile which looked more like a grimace with all the food in his mouth. Anna just stared as Dean cut a big portion of his pancake with the side of his fork and shoved in his mouth. The man let out a groan that was near pornographic as threw his head back, showing off his long, smooth neckline.

“Boy, one more noise while eating and I'll whack you with a spoon!” 

Missouri appeared around the corner of the kitchen, pointing a spoon at Dean threateningly. 

“Ish sooow goooh!” Dean looked like a man who hadn’t eaten in ages, and he was definitely enjoying the experience. His eyes fluttered closed as he sighed contently. Dean picked up another piece and brought it to his mouth, his pouty lips wrapping around the fork. 

Just like he wrapped his mouth around his--

 

Castiel loudly cleared his throat, feeling that the room got about hundred degrees hotter. 

“Anna, can I see you for a minute?” Cas hastily asked, turning to hurry out of the kitchen. What did he do? He… let a demon have his way with him. And he actually enjoyed it. Except for…

Castiel winced as he remembered the blinding light, the pain in his chest. His hand flew to his heart as it beat faster at the memory. He saw a Demon feeding on a soul too many times before. Too many to count. The demon would touch a human soul, devouring it. Leaving behind an empty corpse. Nobody survived. But miraculously, he did. He frowned down at his chest, which felt fine and intact. In fact, he didn’t feel the pain from last night-- which felt like he was being torn to millions of pieces at the time. He was certain that Dean consumed his soul. But why was he not… dead?

 

“Castiel.” 

Anna stood in front of him, her arms crossed over her chest, leaning against the wall. Her red hair was terribly ruffled but her blue eyes were sharp and cold. 

“What am I doing here?”

Castiel squared his shoulders. Better to get this conversation over with.

“How much do you remember?” 

“I- I was drinking out with my friends,” Anna frowned. Why was everything so hazy?

“And then… there was an old man who wanted me to buy me a drink. A very… creepy kind of bald guy. I said no many times, but he insisted. He said… I was too sentimental.” she scrunched up her face. 

“I remember going to the dorm and... “ she frowned as she tried to remember the last few hours. 

“And?” Cas asked, tense as he urged her on.

“And… there was this light-” 

She gasped as she felt fragments of memories coming back to her. 

 

 

_ It was too bright, too much white light. Too bright that her eyes hurt like she just saw directly at a camera flash. Only it was thousand times worse. High pitch screams rattled her ears as she tried to fight back. She then remembered something else. But this was different. What was it? A dream? _

_ She saw the same white light blinding her. Their screeches saying nonsense as she saw suddenly saw Castiel. He was just standing there, looking straight ahead. His blue eyes were like blocks of ice as if he was just a statue. Trying to block the screams by pressing both of her hands to her ears, she cried out for her brother.  _

_ “Cas? Get out of here!” _

_ But he was still, eerily unmoving.  _

_ “Cas!”  _

_ Suddenly a beam of light passed through Castiel, impaling him at the center of his chest, and out his back. A trickle of blood oozed from one of his eyes as he gasped softly.  _ _ It seemed to be in slow motion as he fell backward. His eyes were wide open and his mouth was slightly ajar as he silently fell. Everything around her seemed to be falling down as well, shaking and crumbling. The light was slowly fell into pieces and darkness swallowed him down. _

 

 

Anna was jerked out of her vision as she swayed at the dizziness. Castiel was looking at her, alarmed, hands already coming forward to catch her. 

“Anna? What is it?” 

“I…” Anna gulped as she forced herself to look into Castiel’s blue eyes. The ones that are still vibrant with life, not like the empty ones she saw.  

 

“I remember seeing you die.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who volunteered to beta my work! I really appreciate it <3


	8. *Author's Note*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just to let you know that this fic isn't abandoned <3

I know some people are really waiting for me to finish this story and believe me I had all the story outline from start to finish. But I am having a really bad time right now, mostly because of my parents who don't support any of the LGBTQ activities. I also came to have problems with university classes because of that.   
That slowly led me to depression again which I have been trying to battle for many years. It just hit me harder than last time.   
As my family is Asian and they have their conservative views, they aren't even willing to take me to a therapist or a psychologist because they're afraid it will mark me and them as "insane", or as "someone who went to an asylum". I know it sounds completely crazy but that's how my family works. They don't believe depression could be born with, and only happens because of one's environment. Even when my mother's family line had many cases suffering from depression, they don't believe it when I say genetics can play a role in my mental state and I may need medication to deal with it. 

I only just turned 18 this year which makes me legal in Europe but in Korea, you are of legal age at 19. So I still have to wait one more year to become truly independent. I also want to work to save some money for myself but my parents aren't allowing that as well. Because I live with them, they can control my every move and they didn't even give me a functioning phone data or number so I can't contact anyone unless I'm connected to the internet. 

I am trying to solve my situation as best as I can so that I could come back writing fandom stuff again. Thank you so much for all the people who are still leaving kudos to my story (my first ever destiel fic so this story is my baby <3). That means a lot to me. And special thanks to kiana <3 , who still left comments after I left it un-updated for months. When I can get back to this spn fandom again (who knows when but I pray it will be soon), I hope I can work with you on this story? If you want, of course :)

I will try to update my status on [my Tumblr](https://sammyzwifi.tumblr.com/)

I may not be able to update so frequently because I have to sneak around on Tumblr without my parents knowing. But every one of the comments or small gestures is what makes me smile and helps me go through the day. 

AKF <3

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction ever so please bear with me!  
> This was an idea I had in my head for a while and I really hope everyone who reads this enjoys it!  
> Kudos and comments would mean the world to me because I am really nervous if this fic is even good enough and I really want to know if you guys liked it at all. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading!  
> xoxo
> 
> visit me on instagram? @sammyzwifi


End file.
